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As you might have noticed, this here blog is one big archive of the ramblings of an insane author. So insane, in fact, that I wouldn't be surprised if you went mad just reading said blog...Good luck ;)

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I lied. This is not, in fact, a "directory" as the title above might suggest...This is merely a warning of what you might find on this blog. I believe I have already warned you of the insane ramblings archived in this blog, but I must say, if you are not prepared for the tomfooleries that can be found here, you might just want to close this tab, shut your computer down, and walk away slowly in order to keep your OWN sanity in check. Fair warning >;)

Friday, August 21, 2009

Excuse me, would you be so kind as to catch me? I seem to be falling...

Okay, so not everyone knows this, but since I was a cheerleader for three years in Popwarner, I do know this. When I went to my first cheer-camp, and learned how to fly for the first time (flying is when the other girls on your team pick you up, and throw you around. A "Stunt" team consists of two spotters, one on each side of the Flyer, one back-spot, and sometimes one front spot, depending on the type of stunt you are preforming), the instructors informed us that if a Flyer thought that they were going to fall, they should yell out "falling", so their spotters could have some warning before they had to catch you. Now, unless you've ever done any stunts as a cheerleader before, then you probably don't know that when one is falling out of a stunt, it happens really fast. One moment, your standing up there with your spotters holding your feet, and the next, they're cradling you because you just fell. You get like, not even two seconds warning before you realize that you are indeed about to fall, and when you do realize it, you are already falling and there is no point in yelling "falling" when your spotters can clearly see that you are falling. And I repeat, there is no point in yelling that you are falling, when you have just landed in their arms, because you hadn't had time to realize that you just fell, until it was too late. If that even makes any sense. Which, in my opinion, it makes perfect sense. But I'm kinda nuts, so whatever. Anyway, so when I hear this from the instructors, I'm just thinking, "What, you want me to pause mid-fall and be like, 'excuse me, would you be so kind as to catch me? I seem to be falling...' Yeah, right." But I didn't say this aloud...
Of course, I didn't really need the "falling" system, because I hardly ever fell. In fact (not to brag, or anything), I got a special ribbon for flying my first time out, because I did a Full (which is when your spotters hold you up over their heads, and let me tell you, for someone who's afraid of heights, it's pretty high up there) and hardly anyone who was flying for the first time did Fulls. That was supposed to be reserved for when you get the hang of a Half (which is when your spotters hold you at chin length). And, I was pretty good at doing a cradle (which is when your spotters are holding you up there, in a Full or Half, and then they count, "one, two, down up" and on "up" they throw you in the air, and catch you in a cradle. Hence the name). Okay, so I'm bragging a little, but hey. My point here is, that a lot of the stuff they make you do when you are a cheerleader, is really stupid and annoying. Like, one of my many coaches once told us, that to be a cheerleader, just act really chipper and retarded, and you'll look the part. You see, they make you smile. All the time. And for someone like me (who hates those stupid chipper-cheetahs), it is very difficult to do nothing but smile, and jump around acting all hyper, when your standing there in the sun all day, watching the football guys play (yeah, they make you stand there in the sun during the whole game, and you have to stand up strait, with your hands behind your back, and when your coach yells out a cheer she wants you to do, you have to turn around and do it, smiles and jumping and crisp movements and all, until she yells "one more time", and then you get to end it, Rally, -which is when you jump up and down yelling stuff like," go team go!" "we rock!" etc. etc.- and then you get to turn back around and stand there until the couch yells out another cheer. It's a vicious cycle...) and you get hot and cranky, and your feet hurt, and god forbid your coach gets stunt happy and makes you do stunts on the dirt, and cheer at the same time. Which is hard, because it's not very sturdy up there as it is, but then try waving your arms about, and tell me whether or not you can keep your balance. Not that I ever complained to the coach, or just stopped doing what I was told. I would just get it over with, and do a good job while I was at it. Anyway, the real point is, cheerleading is harder than people think, and it really sucks when your training for a competition, (doing a routine over and over and over and over and over again) and one stunt team falls during the routine, and the coach makes the whole team do laps around the whole football field, then come back and do push-ups and sit-ups, and then go back to doing you routines (did I happen to mention that when I was cheering, the coaches expected me to do Gymnastics as well? Yeah, so we could tumble at competitions as well as doing Stunts). Cheerleading is a hard-core sport, and no one realizes this.
...Except me...
Blog ya later, Miss Eccentric.
Okay, so this blog was a lot longer than I had originally planed it to be...(I do that a lot) but hey, I just needed to vent about cheerleading...Also, I must add that both my parents deserve kudos for helping me out the whole time I was in cheer. My mom was a cheerleader in high school (the first sophomore in her school to make varsity), so she helped me a lot with my routines, and my dad and my brother and my mom used to help me with my Stunts, by picking me up themselves. So, kudos to all of them for picking me up and throwing me around, and helping me out when I needed it. Love you guys!

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