Welcome, to all of those insane enough to walk this blog!

As you might have noticed, this here blog is one big archive of the ramblings of an insane author. So insane, in fact, that I wouldn't be surprised if you went mad just reading said blog...Good luck ;)


I lied. This is not, in fact, a "directory" as the title above might suggest...This is merely a warning of what you might find on this blog. I believe I have already warned you of the insane ramblings archived in this blog, but I must say, if you are not prepared for the tomfooleries that can be found here, you might just want to close this tab, shut your computer down, and walk away slowly in order to keep your OWN sanity in check. Fair warning >;)

Sunday, November 7, 2010

The One, the Amazing, the Awesome, the Legendary, the Coveted, and the Best, the Number Two Pencil!

Legend has been told that there is a one and only most wanted pencil, one that is not even one to begin with: It's the Number Two Pencil. Throughout the years this fabled pencil has gone down in history as the lucky pencil to pretty much everyone who wants a pencil. For some reason all who spot the pencil claim to love it, and then they must have it. Say there's a Number Two Pencil sitting in the middle of the street, for instance. Inevitably, one person will come along who spots the pencil, notices that it is indeed the great Number Two Pencil, and scream's "STOP! Don't move, it's a Number Two Pencil!!!" whilst running in the middle of the street. And if that person were to be asked why they ran in the middle of the street to grab a stupid pencil, they will again inevitably say, "it's my lucky pencil!" as way of explanation. 'Tis the curse of the Number Two Pencil, it seems...Everyone thinks that it is the best pencil in the world, and will do anything to get their hands on one. It's like a conspiracy! I mean, how else do you explain it? It's like the company who makes the pencils ingrained some kind of mind-control device inside the pencil, one that tells people that it's the best pencil ever, and that YOU WANT THIS PENCIL ONLY, IT IS A SPECIAL PENCIL. That way, people will always strive to get their pencils, no matter how great the competition is! It's like they want everyone in the world to carry around a Number Two Pencil, thinking that it's some kind of special talisman, so they can later activate the mind-control device inside the pencils and brainwash us into doing exactly as they say like giving them money and recruiting other countries and polishing their shoes and making more pencils and getting their coffee and giving them more money so they can TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!!
Okay, so maybe that's just a wee bit improbable. But it could be possible! Heck, even I, the one sitting here typing away about conspiracies, will admit that I have a certain fondness of the dreaded Number Two Pencil. Why, you ask? Well, I don't know why! All I know is that I may have been brainwashed by the pencil company to love their pencils, but I still have my free will, and I will not carry around a pencil of theirs like a crazy person and get them their coffee! I will strike against the Number Two Pencil movement! If I see a Number Two Pencil in the middle of the street, I will not run and grab it for the sake of having it, I will leave it lying on the ground to get run over! And I advise all of you to follow my lead! Do not fall into the trap of the Number Two Pencil! If you see one, just stick your chin up in the air, and keep walking! And spread the word about the Anti-Number Two Pencil Act (ANTPA)!!! You can do it, I know you can. Just resist the temptation and allure of the Number Two Pencil!

Blog ya later, Miss Eccentric.