Welcome, to all of those insane enough to walk this blog!

As you might have noticed, this here blog is one big archive of the ramblings of an insane author. So insane, in fact, that I wouldn't be surprised if you went mad just reading said blog...Good luck ;)

Directory

I lied. This is not, in fact, a "directory" as the title above might suggest...This is merely a warning of what you might find on this blog. I believe I have already warned you of the insane ramblings archived in this blog, but I must say, if you are not prepared for the tomfooleries that can be found here, you might just want to close this tab, shut your computer down, and walk away slowly in order to keep your OWN sanity in check. Fair warning >;)
Showing posts with label fear of heights. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fear of heights. Show all posts

Friday, February 11, 2011

The Curse of the Ghostrider

Okay, so anyone who knows me knows that I am like, the biggest chicken when it comes to heights. Therefore, it goes to show that I would also be terrified of roller-coasters. When going to Knott's Berry Farm the biggest thing I'll go on is the Jaguar, and that thing is like, the most tame ride there. Except for the stuff in the kiddie-area, of course. You see, this fear all started when I was about eight years old, and my family talked me into going on the Ghostrider, the big, rickety, wooden dinosaur that those stupid theme-park people have dubbed an "amusement ride". In my family's defense, they had ridden it before and had said that it wasn't that bad. And in a normal circumstance, I believe them to be right. It certainly isn't the worst ride there, and there are a lot of younger children that love the ride. I was not one of them.
We must have waited in line for an hour, I swear. It was a hot Summer afternoon. We got up to the cars finally, and we had decided that I was just barely tall enough to ride. My Mum and I slipped into the car together, because riding with my mom was the most logical decision in order to make me feel more comfortable. Next we had to put our seat-belts on. Now, one thing you must know about Ghostrider seat-belts, is that there is one regular belt for each person, like in a motor vehicle, and then there's a bar that locks down on your lap. One more thing you must know about the Ghostrider seat-belts, is that when I was eight-years-old, that was not the case. When I was eight, there was one single belt restraint that went over both passenger's laps, and it didn't really tighten up that much. So as my Mum and I sat and tried to tighten it enough for me so that it actually touched me, we started to doubt our decision to get on that damn ride. We both knew I wasn't secure, and my Mum, being the responsible, loving parent she is actually tried to inform the Knott's idiots of this restraint error. Unfortunately for her, they did not pay heed to the panicking mother. Instead, they started the ride, and there was nothing more she could do about it. The first hill you climb is the biggest. As you can imagine, the tiny little eight-year-old with no restraints on was not a big fan of that first big drop, and surely I was not a fan of the following drops, twists and turns. I had to sit in the fetal position, holding on to the belt and any bar I could get ahold of. My Mum also had to help by holding her arm around me, as the force of the ride was too much for a wimpy eight-year-old to completely handle by herself. By the time it was over, my Mum's arm was bruised and numb, and I was scarred for life.
Fast-forward eleven years, to a nineteen-year-old me, who is still terrified of roller-coasters, especially that particular one. I nearly died on it as a child, so there is no judging me on this standpoint. When you have a near-death experience on a roller-coaster, then you may tell me whether or not you might have a complex about it. Until then, back off. So there.
Anyway, went off subject a little there...Okay, so there I was, eleven years later, and I had finally worked up the courage to say, "okay, let's go" when my Mum suggests we ride the Ghostrider. I had made up my mind, and there was no changing it. It was just yesterday, in fact, on a Thursday, which surprisingly was a really good day to go, because there was virtually no line. We just walked up to the cars, waited for it to empty out, and got in. As I've said already, the restraints are considerably better than eleven years ago. So Mum and I sat, put our separate belts on tightly, and locked our --also separate-- bars over our laps. It seemed secure, so we were both feeling pretty confident. The ride started, we made it to the first big drop, and then we started climbing. The ride click, click, clicked loudly, but then suddenly, clunk, squeeaak! We stopped in the middle of our climb to the drop. My first thoughts: "Oh my God, I am cursed!"
And I just so happened to say this aloud. The people behind us cussed and said something along the lines of, "I don't want to ride this now". The people in front of us turned around and exclaimed, "oh, so this is your fault?!?" Mum and I explained how I nearly fell to my death when I was eight. They completely blamed me for this second freak accident, because as I had so wisely exclaimed, I was cursed. This was it. It was time for the Ghostrider to exact its revenge on me for surviving the first time. And this time, it was out for blood...
But then, as if a miracle had been sent by God, the ride started, and soon we were plunging down that first big drop. I screamed and closed my eyes. But for some reason, after that, I started laughing and yelling hysterically, as if I had lost too much oxygen and gone completely mad. My Mum tried asking me if I was having fun mid-ride, but all I could do was laugh and shake my head, saying "this is crap, I don't like this...!"
By the end of the ride, I was dizzy from my lack of oxygen, and I was shaking with adrenaline. As we walked off the ride and down the exit lane, I said to my Mum, "that was friggin' crazy. Wanna go again?"

Blog ya later, Miss Eccentric.

Friday, February 19, 2010

Dizzyland

Yesterday was my best bud's fifteenth birthday, so tomorrow...We're all going to Disneyland to celebrate! Unfortunately for us, our timing is quite off, since there's supposed to be a storm this weekend...But, at least we're all going to be together, which is really all that counts I suppose. I mean, we're going to celebrate Mr. Whiskers' fifteenth birthday, so it doesn't really matter where we go to do it. Although, if the rain lets up, we're most likely going to go swimming in a hotel pool (did I mention that the birthday boy and some friends are staying at the Disney Resort? No? That's probably because I unfortunately can't stay over night, as me and my family have plans for Sunday...). My Mum says that it wouldn't be a good idea to swim in the rain (like we did the time before last when Mr. Whiskers invited us to Disney for his birthday), because we could get hit by lightning. You know, 'cause lightning is attracted to water, and all that. And yes, I know that the chance of getting hit by lightning in a hotel pool at Disneyland is very very slim, but you never know, it could happen! Mum says that if I did get hit by lightning, at least she would get a hefty amount of compensation from Disney. She says that if they don't have a sign up at the pool warning you not to swim in the rain, she could sue them. I find this not only hilarious, but actually worth getting hit by lightning for. You see, if I get hit by lightning and die, it will be most likely instantly, therefore no pain, and my family gets a bunch of money for it. If I get hit by lightning and survive, no harm no foul, and me and my family still get a bunch of money. Win-win, no?
(Don't worry if you didn't laugh, my family's sense of humor is quite dark. Especially mine)
Anyway, I'm actually quite glad that we're not going into the park. And I know, you're probably thinking right now, "what?!? It's Disneyland! What is wrong with you?!? Everyone loves Disneyland!!!" But you would be wrong on that standpoint. Because I think that the kind of people who don't like Disneyland are either emo's, who don't like anything cheery (I'll admit that that is partly the reason for which I do not like Disneyland that much, although that is because I just don't like cheery that much, not because I'm emo), or, someone who has a lot of phobias. And I'm one of those people.
Shall I list the most important phobias related to the subject of not liking Disneyland? Well, there's that thing where I don't like germs. I really don't like germies. Their gross, and you would not believe the crap you could catch at a high traffic place like Disneyland. The germs are like the size of a bus or something (No offense to BBB, I do not classify your big damn bus of a home as one big germ. In fact, you're both very clean from what I've seen). And yes, the maintenance people at Disneyland wipe things down every hour, but just think of how many snot-nosed kids can wipe their boogers on ride seat belts, or bars or whatever in an hour. You're scared now, right? Well, you should be.
Then we have the classic fear of heights. This is a common one, but it doesn't mean that I'm still not scared to death to get on one of those stupid roller coasters.
And last but surely not least, we have claustrophobia. This can be very much a problem when you have to stuff yourself into a very small seat and then ride through a very dark amusement ride and then drop down an unexpected dip. This sort of ride kind of includes all three major phobias of mine, the small dark seating, the germs from the last few hundred people who rode before me, and the falling down a large drop. Which sucks, and eliminates quite a few rides, really (for me at least). Then I'm just the party-pooper who sits by the sidelines waiting for everyone else to get off the rides, which also sucks quite a lot. So let's just say that I'm not too disappointed that we're most likely not going into the park.
Any-ways...That's all folks!!! I'll be sure to update tomorrow night and let ya'll know how much fun I had that you didn't! Hehe...
Blog ya later, Miss Eccentric.
P.S. Besides, am I the only one who hates chipper people? Oh wait, I've already touched on that...Oh well, saying it twice will only get the point across faster. Also, It's A Small World drives me nuts, 'cause then I'm sharing the joy for two weeks afterwords with that stupid song.