Welcome, to all of those insane enough to walk this blog!

As you might have noticed, this here blog is one big archive of the ramblings of an insane author. So insane, in fact, that I wouldn't be surprised if you went mad just reading said blog...Good luck ;)


I lied. This is not, in fact, a "directory" as the title above might suggest...This is merely a warning of what you might find on this blog. I believe I have already warned you of the insane ramblings archived in this blog, but I must say, if you are not prepared for the tomfooleries that can be found here, you might just want to close this tab, shut your computer down, and walk away slowly in order to keep your OWN sanity in check. Fair warning >;)

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Good and bad ways to die

Okay, so I promised myself I would blog more often than this just so I have a whole pot-load of blogs by the end of the year, but it's been like, three days since I blogged last. And I just can't have that. I need to blog at least every other day (we'll see if I can actually pull that off though, since we have lots of company coming on the twenty second, plus we have more coming on Christmas day).
So anyway, I was just thinking about death (aren't I cheery? I am so into the joy of Christmas), and I just thought it would be kind of funny to blog about different ways you can die. I mean, for instance, dying naked would be a bad way to die, since it's pretty embarrassing to die in the nude. On the other hand, a good way to die would be something heroic, like getting hit by a car after shoving a complete stranger out of the way of said car. So here's a few good and bad ways to die, just for sh*ts (so I have an aversion to cursing, what of it?) and giggles (at least the ones I can think of right now):

Death by drowning is a bad way to die, because have you ever held your breath for as long as you could? It is unbearably uncomfortable.

Death by pulling off an awesome stunt involving water-skies and a helicopter, on the other hand, is a good way to die.

Death by electrocution, is a bad way to die. Have you ever gotten shocked while cleaning a TV screen? Try multiplying that to the point where it's deadly. Not something you want to do.

Okay, so I can't think of any good way to die involving electricity, because really. If you got hit by lightning, you would fry and it would be gross, and even if you saved someone or something by sacrificing yourself, you would still be fried and gross.

Death by being buried alive, is a horrible way to die. Not only do you get to suffocate to death slowly as the oxygen is used up, you also have to deal with the small, dark loneliness of the box or coffin or whatever you're buried in.

If you where buried alive without anyone knowing, and you were asleep and didn't even know you were buried yourself though, that wouldn't be quite as bad. As long as you didn't wake up and realize you were buried in the ground and not dead (yet).

Working to death, really bad way to die. I mean, working really hard is not fun as it is, but working till you literally die? Not my cup of tea.

Dying at work though, not so bad, especially if it's a job that helps people, like being a cop or something. Plus, your family will get money from your work depending on what you did for a living.

Death by murder, not a good way to die. Dying at the hands of someone you knew and perhaps loved, even worse.

Being murdered in the place of someone else, as they get away, that's a good way. What better way to die than to die saving another's life?

And the worst way to die? Alone.

The best way? For someone you love. Doesn't matter how.

I'll have to consult my friends and family to come up with their favorite best and worst ways to die. If I ask my Dad, he'll give me several pages worth of ridiculously funny and awful ways to die, so look forward to that, I suppose.
Blog ya later, Miss Eccentric.
P.S. My Dad thinks electrocution is hilarious, so expect at least one of his good or bad ways to die to include electricity in some way.

1 comment:

  1. Very good, death by fire would not be good eather you would have to smell burning flesh, as you burn, plus it would hurt alot.